The Skeptic's NFL Training Camp Guide: Ugh, it's NFC South Time

Dumping this at 5:00 on Friday as if I'm a senator admitting that my sex tape with the cactus is real. You won't hurt my feelings if you don't read it. Also, there's no paywall, because my conscience cannot bear to charge anyone hard-earned money for NFC South coverage.

Let's get this over with.

Atlanta Falcons

Sometimes, when I am on the Stairmaster at Planet Fitness, I wonder what I must look like: paunchy, wheezing, melting like a Klondike Bar, desperately flailing my limbs and burning every scrap of energy to accomplish little while going absolutely nowhere.

Then I think about the Falcons, and suddenly I don’t feel so bad about myself. 

Leadership Structure

Matt Ryan now runs football operations; his primary qualification is that Arthur Blank probably still owed him money. Head coach Kevin Stefanski arrives from the Browns. That is indeed a step up, though you need a laser-guided altimeter to measure it.

Quarterback

Tua Tagovailoa has the arm of a JV second baseman. Michael Penix has torn more ACL’s than he has knees. Both are likely to scurry behind the sofa like tabby cats if you pop a paper bag too close to them. 

Offense

Drake London and Bijan Robinson rock. Kyle Pitts rocked for a few games last year when he realized his earning potential was in jeopardy. The offensive line, plum tuckered out from years of blocking for Kirk Cousins, is now bulwarked by Chiefs rejects, while the rest of the receiving corps is full of guys Jalen Hurts treated the way a toddler treats steamed broccoli. 

Defense

This is a defense built to beat Tyler Shough, and only Tyler Shough. 

Special Teams

New kicker Nick Folk still gets the job done at 41. Third-round pick Zachariah Branch could be a dangerous return man. The Falcons and Dolphins swapped punters; isn’t that fun? 

Camp Stuff

At presstime, Penix had not yet been medically cleared for full-squad practices, though he did participate in 7-on-7’s in minicamp. All the rumblings suggest that Stefanski wants to choose his starter quickly; it’s hard to imagine Penix overtaking Tua from a cold start in the course of a few weeks. Snark aside, both quarterbacks are effective enough to not nerf Bijan’s fantasy value. That’s all that matters, right? 

Kaleb McGary’s offseason retirement opened a hole at right tackle. ESPN’s Marc Raimondi reports that former Seahawks late-round pick Michael Jerrell took most of the first-string reps there during OTAs. Former Chiefs penalty machine Jawaan Taylor is still rehabbing arm injuries, while fellow Chiefs castoff Wanya Morris appears to be behind Jerrell on the depth chart. Remember: no matter who wins the quarterback battle, the right tackle will be a blindside protector. 

Edge rusher James Pearce will likely face a suspension for his February arrest, even though he appears to have wriggled away from serious legal consequences. Newcomers Samson Ebukam and Azeez Olujari are the favorites to replace Pearce during his possible three-to-six game absence. Ebukam was a capable journeyman starter for many years before a 2024 Achilles tear. Olujari is one of those disappointing early-round picks that the Giants held onto forever; he played a bit role for the Eagles last year. The Falcons recorded 57 sacks last year after only cracking 40 sacks once in the previous nine years. 

Early Thoughts

Ugh. Yuck. Blech. 

I’m tired of worrying about Tua’s survival and lost all faith in Penix after the clapping incident. Pearce should spend his autumn picking up trash on the side of I-85, not chasing Baker Mayfield. London and Bijan will have to be Jerry Rice and Walter Payton for the Falcons to do more than finish around .500 and maybe earn a one-and-done playoff berth by winning the NFL’s Participation Trophy Division.

Ugh. Yuck. Blech. 

Carolina Panthers

America’s pluckiest midmajor welterweights are back, battling once again for a chance to play in the Pop-Tarts Bowl.

Leadership Structure

GM Dan Morgan, head coach Dave Canales and coordinators Brad Idzik and Ejiro Evero are all entering their third seasons on the job. Can you describe the Panthers’ offensive philosophy? Their defensive scheme? Their roster-building strategy and tendencies? Shouldn’t this team have some identity besides “NFC South Pale Ale” by now? 

Quarterback

Bryce Young squeezes every drop of production he can get from that itsy-bitsy body of his. It’s barely enough. 

Offense

Lots of Panthers playmakers are "about to break big." Some, like Tet McMillan and perhaps Jalen Coker, might actually break big. Others, like Xavier Legette, Ja'Tavion Sanders and Jonathon Brooks, have been about to break big for several years. Chuba Hubbard broke big, then broke small again, but he's still in the lineup. Time moves differently in Charlotte. 

Defense

Newcomer Jaelan Philips is a fine edge rusher. The Panthers are acting like he’s Myles Garrett. The same can be said of Devin Lloyd: he's good, but he's not Luke Kuechly, or even Dan Morgan. Defenders like Derrick Brown and Jaycee Horn are not so much great as “great by Panthers standards.” Talent evaluation works differently in the NFC South. 

Special Teams

Kicker Ryan Fitzgerald was non-disastrous as a rookie. The return chores will be handled by The Other Etienne Brother. 

Camp Stuff

Second-year edge rusher Nic Scourton tore an ACL on the first day of training camp. Scourton played very well down the stretch in 2025. The Panthers were already thin on the edge behind Philips and Scourton.

With Ickey Ekwonu likely to miss much of the season with a patellar tendon injury, Rasheed Walker and rookie Monroe Freeling were supposed to battle for the left tackle job. But right tackle Taylor Moton is sidelined indefinitely with (yikes) a blood clot in his lung, so Freeling begins camp on the right side, with Walker on the left.

RB Jonathon Brooks is still in the team’s plans despite tearing his right ACL in 2023 (at Texas) and 2024 (missing all of 2025). I’ve seen speculation that Brooks will push Hubbard for the starting job. Beware of anyone who makes such assertions based on a scouting report from three years and two ACL surgeries ago. 

Early Thoughts

The Moton and Scourton situations really harshed the buzz at the start of Panthers camp. The Panthers and their fans may have been a little-optimistic about the division-champions-by-default, but there were some legitimate reasons to hope for, say, 9-10 wins and another chance to do something in a home playoff game. The Panthers are now just trying to get through July without any more catastrophes.

You know what they say about the team that chose a black cat as its mascot.

New Orleans Saints

Out of cap hell. Now in mediocrity purgatory. (Mediogatory?)

Leadership Structure

Mickey Loomis is a salary cap flim-flam artist who has (almost) run out of Pro Bowl veteran contracts to Silly Putty into the next century. The Saints are now reliant on his draft acumen, which is not a thing.

Head coach Kellen Moore and defensive coordinator Brandon Staley are a pair of career lieutenants masquerading as generals. 

Quarterback

With the right combination of wishful thinking, willful ignorance, reduced expectations, Bourbon Street Hurricanes and 50-milligram sativa seltzers (available at a little bodega on Decatur Street!), you just might be able to pulverize your brain into believing that Tyler Shough is anything more than a fourth-quartile placeholder.

Offense

Rookie Jordan Tyson and newcomer Travis Etienne join incumbents Chris Olave and Alvin Kamara. That sounds pretty impressive. Then you notice that guys like Devaughn Vele, Ja’Lynn Polk and Noah Fant are penciled into meaningful roles. And that Shough is the quarterback.

Defense

All NFC South defenses must be graded on a curve because they face so many NFC South offenses. Cam Jordan is back (on a one-year deal, as opposed to his old 73-year deal), which gives a sense of how the youth movement on defense is going.

Special Teams

KICKER BATTLE: Charlie Smyth replaced Brandon Grupe at kicker last year and was barely adequate. Smyth will battle Tanner Brown, formerly of the Rams and Falcons practice squads, who drilled a 60-yard field goal for the UFL’s Louisville Kings in May and was signed by the Saints in June.  

Sixth-round pick Barion Brown is the favorite to replace Rashid Shaheed. Brown returned six kickoffs for touchdowns in college, so this is not nearly as embarrassing as it sounds. 

Camp Stuff

Spencer Rattler and Zach Wilson will battle for the backup quarterback job. Rattler lost the starting job to Shough last year. Wilson got passed over by Quinn Ewers when Mike McDaniel finally benched Tua Tagovailoa out of desperation. I’m not fully convinced that Shough is better than Rattler. And Wilson is only six weeks older than Shough. 

Early Thoughts

There don’t appear to be many positions up for grabs in Metairie this year. As I noted in the Titans preview, lack of competition can be a problem for a mediocre-to-dreadful team. There are lots of Saints who should be fighting for their jobs, not settling comfortably into them, starting with Shough.

That said, watching Moore sort out the receivers, the backup quarterback and the kicker should be mildly entertaining. Olave’s contract status is also worth monitoring: anything is possible when Loomis brandishes a checkbook. And we should see enough of Shough in the preseason to get a better sense of his progress. Unless Moore decides that Shough doesn’t need the work. Which will be a tell that the Saints are in the process of deluding themselves. 

Tampa Bay Buccaneers

Welcome to the aftermath of the Tom Brady aftermath.

Leadership Structure

Jason Licht and Todd Bowles are dead men walking. Licht will fire Bowles as soon as his career preservation instinct overcomes his love of continuity. The Glazers will fire Licht once they remember that they own an American football team. 

Quarterback

Baker Mayfield, who peaked last October as a kinda-sorta-maybe MVP sleeper, wants a contract extension. Do you want to break the bad news to him, or should we?

Mayfield was playing through a whole anatomy textbook’s worth of injuries last year. No duh: he looked like Wile E. Coyote after an ACME fireworks explosion by halftime of the Rams game. Ten out of ten for toughness, but I don’t think I’m really beat up is the persuasive argument for extending the contract of a 31-year old journeyman that Mayfield thinks it is. 

Offense

Florida didn’t sheer off and float into the Gulf of Mexico when Mike Evans left, but it was a close call. Bucky Irving and Kenneth Gainwell give Mayfield dueling all-purpose guys in the backfield. Chris Godwin will represent the old guard, when healthy. If you are pinning your hopes on Emeka Egbuka blossoming into a superstar after his outstanding rookie half-year, I invite you to look up Michael Clayton. 

Defense

Lavonte David retired; Alex Anzalone and rookie Josiah Trotter will try to replace him. Rueben Bain should juice the pass rush a bit. It looked like opponents had figured out all of Bowles’ blitz packages last year, but Bowles (who serves as his own defensive coordinator) kept on blitzing. 

Special Teams

Do the television cameras still cut to Danny Smith on the sidelines after every routine field goal, or was that just a Steelers thing? I usually have my hands over my eyes while watching Bucs games.  

Camp Stuff

Jamel Dean’s departure (Steelers) created a vacancy at cornerback. Zyon McCollum’s continued presence creates another one.

Kidding! McCollum’s not that bad. But he’s penciled in as one outside starter, with Benjamin Morrison competing with Jacob Parrish on the other side. Morrison is a tall cornerback who was a frequent burn victim when healthy as a rookie. Parrish is a slot goblin, but rookie Keionte Scott is more of a slot hobgoblin; Scott was even a slot specialist at the college level. Depth was a real problem in the Bucs secondary last year, and it still looks like a problem this year. 

Early Thoughts

With Evans and David gone, the Buccaneers are now a relatively young, mostly-homegrown team. That’s fine. But just because the roster is full of high draft picks from the 2020s doesn’t mean the roster is good. The Bucs have been building to beat the Panthers and Falcons since before Brady retired. They’ve forgotten what it's like to build to beat opponents like the Rams or Seahawks. None of their offseason acquisitions, not even Bain, comes close to moving the needle.

The NFC South migraine has fully set in. Writing about this division is like pouring stale beer over my soul. I’m sorry to dump this division on you before the weekend. But then, you knew what you were getting into when you saw a picture of Tua Tagovailoa but decided to keep reading. So go to the beach! Watch baseball! The Skeptic’s Guide will be back on Monday with the NFC North: Caleb Williams, Dan Campbell, Murray versus McMuffin, Packers slander. It will be fun! Again: I am so sorry.